[etni] Fw: Playing around with language

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I want to add to lifting spirits~ enjoy, Etniers- and "ain't it the truth"?
Nancy BCP
TOUR GUIDE TERM .....and the...... TRANSLATION
Old world charm ........... No bath
Tropical .................. Rainy
Majestic setting .......... A long way from town
Options galore ............ Nothing is included in the itinerary
Secluded hideaway ......... Impossible to find or get to
Pre-registered rooms ...... Already occupied
Explore on your own ....... Pay for it yourself
Knowledgeable trip hosts .. They've flown in an airplane before
No extra fees ............. No extras
Nominal fee ............... Outrageous charge
Standard .................. Sub-standard
Deluxe .................... Standard
Superior .................. One free shower cap
All the amenities ......... Two free shower caps
Plush ..................... Top and bottom sheets
Gentle breezes ............ Occasional Gale-force winds
Light and airy ............ No air conditioning
Picturesque ............... Theme park nearby
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Washington Post's Style Invitational once again asked readers to take any 
word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one 
letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the 2003 winners
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you 
realize that it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas 
from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,shows little sign of breaking 
down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of promoting 
more intimate relationships with the opposite sex.

5. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject 
financially impotent for an indefinite period

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who 
doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit...)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad 
vibes, right? And then like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming 
only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come 
at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n): the frantic dance performed just after you've 
accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beezlebug (n): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom 
at three in the morning and cannot be cast off.

17. Caterpallor (n): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit 
you're eating.

And the pick of the literature

18. Ignoranus: A person who successfully combines the effect being BOTH stupid 
AND acting like a well-known bodily orifice.


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