[etni] Fw: Good play on words

----- Original Message ----- 
From: Maris Mohr - maris.mohr@xxxxxxxxx
Subject: Good play on words

Start the day with a smile :-) .
Maris

 Read carefully...
 
   1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's 
round table was Sir Cumference. He 
acquired his size from too much pi.
 
   2. I thought I saw an eye doctor 
on an Alaskan island, but it 
turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
 
   3. She was only a whisky maker, 
but he loved her still.
 
   4. A rubber band pistol was 
confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math 
disruption.
 
   5. The butcher backed into the 
meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
 
   6. No matter how much you push the 
envelope, it'll still be stationery.
 
   7. A dog gave birth to puppies 
near the road and was cited for littering.
 
   8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen 
in France would result in 
Linoleum Blownapart.
 
   9. Two silk worms had a race. They 
ended up in a tie.
 
   10. Time flies like an arrow. 
Fruit flies like a  banana.
 
   11. A hole has been found in the 
nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
 
   12. Atheism is a non-prophet 
organization.
 
   13. Two hats were hanging on a hat 
rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on 
ahead.'
 
   14. I wondered why the baseball 
kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
 
   15. A sign on the lawn at a drug 
rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
 
   16. A small boy swallowed some 
coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask 
how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
 
   17. A chicken crossing the road is 
poultry in motion.
 
   18. It's not that the man did not 
know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
 
   19. The short fortune-teller who 
escaped from prison was a small medium, at large.
 
   20. The man who survived mustard 
gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
 
   21. A backward poet writes 
in-verse.
 
   22. In democracy it's your vote 
that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
 
   23. When cannibals ate a 
missionary, they got a taste of religion.
 
   24. Don't join dangerous cults, 
practice safe sects

-- 
Peace & Serenity
Maris B. Mohr
poems and pictures



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