[etni] [FWD: Results of the Sweet Soup Powl]

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> -------- Original Message --------
> Subject: Results of the Sweet Soup Powl
> From: "Barry" <barisil@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> Date: Tue, February 24, 2004 3:44 pm
> To: ask@xxxxxxxx
> 
> As Promised, Here are the results of the E mail Powl on how to improve
> the taste of the sweet soup.
> 
> Barry
> 
> 
> Coming soon:   Songs about Ritalin and Instrumental Enrichment
> 
>                             This month's Top Forty
> 
>                             A New Screenplay

HISTORICAL NOTE:   ( For those of you who missed the first episode:    Three 
weeks ago, I cooked up some pea/barley/and cauliflower soup to tide my children 
through a long cold week.  The recipe called for the lentils to be fried up 
with flour and a bit of brown sugar.  I put in way too much sugar.  It came out 
really disgusting and totally inedible.  So I did the obvious thing:  I 
appealed for help to everybody in my address book, including  ETNI community of 
English teachers. . .)

 Never have I received such strong and numerous responses to anything I have 
printed.  Friends and family members who I hardly know anymore, including a few 
who I thought were dead, all wrote to tell me how I can unsweeten my soup, not 
have to spill it out, and thus strike a blow for Ba'al Tash-hit.* 

The most popular suggestion was   LEMON with 12 votes.  Lemon is actually tied 
with salt, for 12; but more people recommended Lemon together with another 
ingredient, so I declare it the winner.                       

Then came tomato, whether in juice, whole, peeled or just plain catsup.
Garlic, curry, and the recycle bin  neck and neck  with about three apiece.

Next -- Alcohol, in its various forms:  Put in a spoonful of white wine.  Put 
in two spoonfuls of vodka.  Putin addressing the Kremlin.  Drink a cup of vodka 
and the hell with the soup. 
Throw in a raw potato.
Throw in a raw sweet potato.
Throw in a raw egg.
Throw in the towel.
        Milk.
        Avocado.
        Pepper.
        Viagra.  (sta-a-a-a-a-a-a-m-m-m!)
  Divide it up into two batches and then dilute it; This is the sorcerer?s 
apprentice approach which, as I know from past experience, leaves you with 
twice as much cruddy soup to deal with.
Here are some even more creative efforts, scraped, as it were off the bottom of 
the pot:
Try  beets, plus Tomato, plus cabbage and plus lemon, and then throw it all 
away.
Give it to the poor.
Take a funnel and pour it into that little slot in your computer to clean out 
all the viruses.  It really works!
Excuse me.  The above is a malicious instruction and was maliciously moved from 
Sunday?s piece about the virus hoaxes, by another malicious instruction.
Puree it, let it stand for 6 weeks and use it as ink for the  HP 840 printer
 Start a soup kitchen.
Stick it where the sun don?t shine.  [ how am I supposed to get it to 
Fairbanks? The Alaska pipeline?]
Feed to dog, preferably the dog that bit you.
Let one of your kids hand it in as a project for the New Bagrut.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Now, what I did was, I tried  EVERYTHING! .  Lemon, potato, salt, you name it.  
 If a rabbi had come by and told me to put in a goat, I would have put in the 
goat  Three days later, the flavour  was just phenomenal.  In fact, I carted 
some to Oranim College and shared it with two classmates in a course on 
Feuerstein?s philosophy.  They are willing to testify to the awesome final 
product. 
 Of course, Feuerstein teaches us that the process is more important.  And, you 
know, I think he had something.
 
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
 
* Ba?al Tash-hit is, for anybody with a good Jewish day school education, is 
the Divine injunction against wasting food.  Whereas my  mother took this to 
extremes ?emptying out her house last Thursday,  I came   across a Tupperware 
container of mock chopped liver kugel from 1983 -- Jews today too often neglect 
this vital precept.  It?s hard enough these days to stop people from wasting 
other people.



By Barry Silverberg and Ehud Marrak,  Feb 23, 2004

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