[bct] Re: Telemarketers

  • From: "Maria" <malyn87@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • To: <blindcooltech@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
  • Date: Fri, 3 Feb 2006 10:02:17 -0500

Dan, you're hopeless but I love it.  You just gave me my first laugh of the
day.  Keep those zingers comin'.


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "The Scarlet Wombat" <coconut@xxxxxxx>
To: <blindcooltech@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Wednesday, February 01, 2006 6:37 PM
Subject: [bct] Telemarketers

> There are several things you can say to them that will entertain you and
> probably scare the fertilizer out of them.
> Them:  Hello, Mr. Graham?
> me:  Who is this calling?
> Them:  This is Jerry from want-a-widget company
> me:  Jerry, this is lieutenant O'Riley from the state police, Mr. Graham
> under investigation for murder, we must insist that anyone who has called
> him or has reason to call him submit to questioning at the local police
> station.  A police cruiser will be there to pick you up within 15
> minutes.  If you leave, you will be arrested for unlawful flight to avoid
> interrogation.
> Note, it is illegal to impersonate a police officer, yet, sometimes, one
> must do what one must do.
> Here's another.
> Them, Hello, is Mr. Graham there?
> me:  Who is calling?
> Them:  This is Jerry fromMadam Tinkertoy's House of Blue Lights
> me:  Jerry, you salty old dog, how the hell are you.  Goddamn, it's been
> years, hasn't it?  How's the wife and kids, what you doing making these
> silly phone calls, anyway?
> Here's one I did back when I was single.
> Them:  Is the lady of the house in?
> me: [very slowly] Yes, she is.
> them:  May I speak to her?
> me:  I'm sorry, she is occupied, we're making love just now.
> them: [horrified female voice] Oh, my God, I'm sorry, Oh my God,
> I laughed for a week after that one.
> Dan

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