Santa's a WomanI think Santa Claus is a woman....I hate to be the one to defy a sacred myth, but I believe he's a she. Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull
it all off!For starters, the vast majority of men don't even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves. On this count alone, I'm
convinced Santa is a woman.Surely, if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning
to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there. First of all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead, gutted and strapped to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid wide-eyed, desperate claims that buck season had been extended.
Blitzen's rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he'd still have transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up there in the snow and clouds and then refuse
to stop and ask for directions. Other reasons why Santa can't possibly be a man: Men can't pack a bag. Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet. Men don't answer their mail.Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything
remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly." Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them.Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up
women. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment. -- Nimer M. Jaber The information transmitted is intended only for the person or entity to which it is addressed and may contain confidential and/or privileged material. Any review, retransmission, dissemination or other use of, or taking of any action in reliance upon this information by persons or entities other than the intended recipient is prohibited. If you received this in error, please contact the sender via reply e-mail, and delete the material from any computer. Website: http://www.empowertheblind.org Phone: (720) (251-4530) blind_html To unsubscribe, please send a blank email to blind_html-request@xxxxxxxxxxxxx with unsubscribe in the subject line. To access the archives, please visit: http://www.freelists.org/archive/blind_html Thanks