blind_html [Fwd: Computer Tech Support]

  • From: Nimer <nimerjaber1@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: blind_html@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Wed, 04 Feb 2009 10:24:06 -0700



-------- Original Message --------
Subject:        Computer Tech Support
Date:   Wed, 4 Feb 2009 07:52:44 -0800
From:   Alan Paganelli <alanandsuzanne@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Reply-To:       Blind-chit-chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To:     Alan J. Paganelli <alzan@xxxxxxxxxx>



    Computer Tech Support
This ought to make you feel better about your computer skills! Well, some of you anyway!
=================================
Tech support:
What kind of computer do you have?
  Female customer:   A white one...
   ===============
Customer:
   Hi, this is Celine . I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support:
  Have you tried pushing the Button?
Customer:  Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support:
   That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer:  No ,
wait a minute.. I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....
  ===============
Tech support:
   Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer:  Your left or my left?
   ===============
Tech support:
   Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer:   Hello... I can't print.
Tech support:
 Would you click on 'start'  for me and...
Customer:
  Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates.
   ===============
Customer:
Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor,
but the computer still says he can't find it...
   ============== =
Customer:
  I have problems printing in red..
Tech support:
   Do you have a color printer?
Customer:  Aaaah....................thank you.
   ===============
Tech support:
   What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer:
   A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
   ===============
Customer:
  My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support:
  Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer:
  No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support:
   Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer:!   OK
Tech support:
  Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer:  Yes
Tech support:
  That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer:
  Yes, there's another one here. Ah..that one does work...
   ===============
Tech support:
Your password is the small letter 'a' as in apple, a capital letter V as n Victor,
the number 7.
Customer:  Is that 7 in capital letters ?
   == =============
Customer:   can't get on the Internet.
Tech support:
  Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer:
  Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support:
   Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer:  Five dots.
   ===============
Tech support:
   What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer:  Netscape.
Tech support:
  That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer:   Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
   ===============
Customer:
I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but
every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
   ===============
Tech support:   How may I help you?
Customer:  I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support:
   OK,  and what seems to be the problem?
Customer:
Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around
it?
   ===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
Tech support:
  Are you running it under windows?
Customer:
'No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in
the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his  printer is working fine.'
   ===============
And last but not least...
Tech support:
'Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the
Program Manager.'
Customer:  I don't have a P.
Tech support:  On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer:   What do you mean?
Tech support:
  'P'.....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer:
  I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!

Regards,
Alan

Please click on: http://www.home.earthlink.net/~alanandsuzanne/ <http://www.home.earthlink.net/%7Ealanandsuzanne/>.
There, you'll find files of my arrangements and performances played on
the Yamaha Tyros keyboard.  I often add files so check back regularly!
The albums in Technics  format formerly on my website are still
available upon request.
__._,_.___
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