blind_html [Fwd: An ad on Craigslist...]

  • From: Nimer <nimerjaber1@xxxxxxxxx>
  • To: blind_html@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
  • Date: Tue, 27 Jan 2009 10:37:24 -0700



-------- Original Message --------
Subject:        An ad on Craigslist...
Date:   Tue, 27 Jan 2009 09:25:27 -0800
From:   Alan Paganelli <alanandsuzanne@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Reply-To:       Blind-chit-chat@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
To:     Alan J. Paganelli <alzan@xxxxxxxxxx>



An  ad on Craigslist...
To:  The Guy Who Mugged Me in  Downtown, Savannah , GA
 I was the white guy with the black  Burrbury jacket that you
 demanded I hand over shortly  after you pulled the knife on me and
 my girlfriend. You  also asked for my girlfriend's purse and
 earrings. I hope  you somehow come across this message. I'd like  to
 apologize.
 I didn't expect you to crap  your pants when I drew my pistol after
 you took my  jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a
 reason  that evening, and it wasn't that cold outside. You see,  my
 girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber 1911 .45 ACP  pistol for
 Christmas, and we had just picked up a sho  ulder holster for it
 that evening. Beautiful pistol, eh?  It's a very intimidating
 weapon when pointed at your  head, isn't it?
 I know it probably wasn't a great deal of  fun walking back to
 wherever you'd come from with that  brown sludge flopping about in
 your pants. I'm sure it  was even worse since you also ended up
 leaving your  shoes, cellphone, and wallet with me. I couldn't have
 you  calling up any of your buddies to come help you try to mug  us
 again. I took the liberty of calling your mother, or  "Momma" as
 you had her listed in your cell, and  explaining to her your
 situation. I also bought myself  some gas on your card. I gave your
 shoes to one of the  homeless guys over by Vinnie Van Go Go's,
 along with all  of the cash in your wallet, then I threw the  wallet
 itself in a dumpster.
I called a bunch of  phone sex numbers from your cell. They'll be
 on your bill  in case you'd like to know which ones. Alltel
 recently  shut down the line, and I've only had the phone for  a
 little over a day now, so I don't know what's going on  with that.
 I hope they haven't permanently cut off your  service. I was about
 to make some threatening phone calls  to the DA's office with it
 Oh well.
 So,  about your pants; I know that I was a little rough on you  when
 you did this whole attempted mugging thing, so I'd  like to make it
 up to you. I'm sure you've already washed  your pants, so I'd like
 to help you out. I'd like to  reimburse you for the detergent you
 used on the pants.  What brand did you use, and was it liquid or
 powder? I'd  also like to apologize for not killing you and  instead
 making you w alk back home humiliated. I'm hoping  that you'll
 reconsider your choice of path in life. Next  time you might not be
 so lucky. If you read this message,  email me and we'll do lunch
 and  laundry.

Regards,
Alan

Please click on: http://www.home.earthlink.net/~alanandsuzanne/ <http://www.home.earthlink.net/%7Ealanandsuzanne/>.
There, you'll find files of my arrangements and performances played on
the Yamaha Tyros keyboard.  I often add files so check back regularly!
The albums in Technics  format formerly on my website are still
available upon request.
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