It shouldn't matter how many books we scan or proofread. There is no excuse for rudeness. Certainly, there is something to be said for plain speaking. There is something to be said for high standards as well. However, we are dealing with human beings here, and human beings have feelings. If we do not take these feelings into account, we run the risk of losing volunteers. For a community like this one, where volunteer effort is so prized, that would be a great detriment. We need to be mindful of our words and our intentions. If we do not intend to hurt the feelings of our fellow list members, then we must communicate in a manner that is courteous. Simply saying that we didn't mean to hurt people is not enough. Are you a fan of women's music? If so, check out the Eclectic Collection: A Celebration of Women In Music, each Wednesday evening from 7 to 9 eastern. www.radio360.us ----- Original Message ----- From: Christina To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Sent: Wednesday, September 09, 2009 2:58 PM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: resigning from the volunteer list Hi, folks. I agree with Amber. The message I've gotten today seems to be "It's ok for people to be rude because we need to have thicker skins or just ignore it." I disagree with both points. Rudeness shouldn't be permitted. There are ways of saying things diplomatically and clearly without being rude or hurtful. And ignoring the behavior says that we approve of it. And, if we approve of this behavior, what reason is there for anyone to change. I'm not suggesting that people refuse to post or that they couch their suggestions or criticisms in tons of platitudes. What I am suggesting is that people try to be mindful of what they are saying. When we're talking to someone, we communicate so much by tone and body language. When we send e-mails, we have only our words which, taken by themselves, can be very subjective. Another message I'm getting is "It's ok for people to be rude because they proof/scan a lot of books." Does this mean we earn the right to be rude? I hope that's not what was meant. Should people be given more leeway if they volunteer more? This doesn't seem fair to me. I hope that we are perceived as a welcoming, supportive, and helpful community that values all of its volunteers from the newbies to those people with several hundred books to their name. Just my two cents. Christina ----- Original Message ----- From: Amber Wallenstein To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Sent: Wednesday, September 09, 2009 3:03 PM Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: resigning from the volunteer list I have a question for you all to consider here. Please do not think I have gone half-cocked here, for I assure you this is not the case. I have spent hours thinking of the best way to put this and I put the question to the volunteer community as a whole. Let us say I'm a new volunteer. I am excited about joining Bookshare's volunteer team, but I don't really know what I'm doing. I decide to join the BKSVOL list to get some tips. I write in with a series of questions. Meanwhile, I am also seeing messages from others flying back and forth across my screen. I as a new volunteer may not know what it means, but I am smart enough to get the tone of the message. Some people seem very friendly, but there are those whose messages seem rude, to put it frankly. Then the answers to my questions start coming in. Some seem OK but then there are others, like E.'s messages that we all know about. As a new volunteer, maybe I now feel like I shouldn't write into this list anymore for advice. After all, if I get a snarky response to my first question, what will happen when I submit further queries? Let's face it folks. We were all newbie volunteers at one time or another. In fact, some of us still are. Why are people not being treated as they should be? Are we saying it's OK for rude and "brusque" and I put that in quotes behavior tolerated? Aren't all volunteers afforded the same right to be treated with courtesy and tolerance? Why is it that a few people can be rude and intolerant, scaring off dozens of volunteers over the years.. Why is that OK? Because they proof hard-to-proof books? Don't we as a community have more respect than that? No matter how hard one works, or what books they tackle, is that an excuse for rude and off-putting behavior? Aren't we as volunteers doing a huge disservice to those who have joined? Saying to a newbie, or heck, anyone, "Well you know what? Their messages are rude, or brusque, but don't worry, they have gotten better, and you should just ignore the behavior"... That's enabling. We as a volunteer community are enabling rude behavior. We have ignored the problem for years. Has it gotten better? No, it does not appear as it has gotten any better. The rude behavior is continuing, with no end in sight. and with the "ignore it and it will go away" attitude most people here seem to have, the behavior is being enabled. Now the behavior has been addressed and you are begging rudeness to return? Why? \ If this person were someone we worked with, and every time you came to their desk, if you got a "brusque" response, would you continue to come back? Probably not, at least I know I would not. I don't know why volunteering is any different. Volunteers are being driven away, and this is OK? I beg to differ. If we are adults, as so many on this list have said, why are we not acting like it, curbing out words, thinking about what we say, and treating others with COURTESY and respect? Amber Book blog: http://community.livejournal.com/book_cuddler/ I have accepted a seat in the House of Representatives, and thereby have consented to my own ruin, to your ruin, and to the ruin of our children. I give you this warning that you may prepare your mind for your fate. John Adams E-Mail: amber.wallens@xxxxxxxxx __________ Information from ESET Smart Security, version of virus signature database 4411 (20090909) __________ The message was checked by ESET Smart Security. http://www.eset.com