[bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
- From: "Lora" <loravara@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Tue, 5 Dec 2006 16:36:47 -0700
Mmm, if you can cook, you've got one on me. I eat out a lot, rather than
sample my own cooking.
-----Original Message-----
From: bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Robert Riddle
Sent: Tuesday, December 05, 2006 6:55 AM
To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
Well, I do make a mean lasagne...and well, I'm a nice fella! Heh.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Lora" <loravara@xxxxxxxxxxx>
To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
Sent: Tuesday, December 05, 2006 5:14 AM
Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
> LOL. And what are your qualifications? <Smirking right back at ya*
>
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> [mailto:bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Robert
> Riddle
> Sent: Tuesday, December 05, 2006 6:11 AM
> To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
>
> Hey Lora, I ain't married, smirk. Heh just kidding.
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "Lora" <loravara@xxxxxxxxxxx>
> To: <bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
> Sent: Tuesday, December 05, 2006 4:06 AM
> Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
>
>
> > Yes, if he'd asked, I would have told him, and under different
> > circumstances, might even have chosen to hold hands. It's not
> > nearly as effective, but on the other hand, we were only going a
> > short
distance.
> >
> > Communication is at the center of it all. And I suppose I'm not
> > surprised that many people don't try to communicate; I don't think
> > it's something Americans are really good at.
> >
> > Be that as it may, talk to me, folks, before you grab me, and we'll
> > do
> just
> > fine. ;)
> >
> > Like Donna, I'll happily educate, and tell you what would be helpful.
> >
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> > [mailto:bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Elizabeth
> > and Burton
> > Sent: Tuesday, December 05, 2006 12:39 AM
> > To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> > Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
> >
> > Under different circumstances I do a variety of things. That is the
> > courtesous good part about asking. It gives the disabled person a
> > chance
> to
> > do what works at the moment.
> >
> > E.
> > At 02:27 AM 12/5/2006, you wrote:
> > >No, same subject, different aspect. I think at CSUN a couple of
> > >years ago I had to ask, or be told, how to guide Donna to the
> > >restaurant. I didn't know whether she should take my arm or I
> > >should take hers. She took charge and told me. I wouldn't think of
> > >taking a person's hand, though, just because I don't think it's very
effective.
> > >
> > >Cindy
> > >
> > >--- Lora <loravara@xxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
> > >
> > > > What you say is true. Regrettably, we live in a
> > > > dangerous world. If I'd
> > > > been more uneasy, I might have shoved him away, which could be
> > > > dangerous for him in the middle of an intersection.
> > > >
> > > > I also think you're right about more physical contact. A new
> > > > acquaintance, when offering to guide me in a restaurant (a
> > > > courtesy I will accept, because the restaurants I tend to go to
> > > > seem to have lots of cramped spaces and such), slipped my hand
> > > > in
his
> to guide.
> > > > I pulled my hand back and took his arm. I wouldn't have minded
> > > > flirting with him, but he's married, and so even holding hands
> > > > seems off limits to me. Maybe that's an entirely different
> > > > subject, though.
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > From: bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> > > > [mailto:bksvol-discuss-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of
> > > > Elizabeth and Burton
> > > > Sent: Monday, December 04, 2006 10:23 PM
> > > > To: bksvol-discuss@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
> > > > Subject: [bksvol-discuss] Re: OT: Overly Helpful People
> > > >
> > > > Reality is grabbing someone, particularly a woman without asking
> > > > first is a stressful and possibly dangerous experience for the
> > > > person being grabbed. I understand the need to help. I will
> > > > stress in the book what we all know and have been trying to
> > > > stress and will use humor to do it. The human being is equipped
> > > > with a mouth and the ability to use it.
> > > > Please let's learn the
> > > > following phrases. Repeat after me children:
> > > > "May I pet your dog."
> > > > "Do you need help."
> > > > alternatives to "Do you need help" include "Are you all right?"
> > > >
> > > > The implicit thing often thought is "I am worried about you. Do
> > > > you need help?" (can I stop worrying) and the other question is
> > > > "I have nobody to help and here is a person I can help." I do
> > > > not like this attitude much since I dislike being an object
> > > > attracting folks who feel so non-needed and attracting them for
> > > > their needs not my help By the way, you can tell that kind.
> > > > Those are the ones who keep insisting and hang on after you have
> > > > said you do not
> need help.
> > > >
> > > > On a more ominous note, I think there are men who physically
> > > > grab blind women for the same reason they would like to grab or
> > > > touch a woman or any kind. You can tell this kind because he is
> > > > the one who tries to cop a feel of my tit while I am hholding
> > > > his arm to cross a street.
> > > >
> > > > Bottom line, I thin, is that anyone needs to be at least a bit
> > > > concerned about somebody grabbing them particularly in
> > > > situations where he might be trying to pick your pocket or such.
> > > > The fact is many of that kind are put off some by dogs.
> > > >
> > > > I also think women who are blind get physically contacted more
> > > > than do blind men. Somebody from AFB wrote a NY Times article
> > > > about it a few years ago.
> > > > I will do my best to get ahold of it. I want AFB in on the book
> > > > project in some way, by the way.
> > > >
> > > > This thing really might take off.
> > > >
> > > > E.
> > > >
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