<USS Avalon> "Three's a Crowd"

Three's a Crowd
By Lieutenant Commander Elissabeth Marksbury
and The Shadow


Exhaustion had overtaken her again. Elissabeth slept lightly, half-way curled 
onto her side, hands tucked sweetly underneath her chin. Watching her, one 
would never know the amount of conflict raging inside of her. She sighed 
slightly, barely stirring, and then dropped into a dream once again. 

Tel and Lyryn had long since blown the barriers away between a business 
relationship and something...more. He watched her sleep, the careful contours 
of her body raising and lowering the sheets in all the right places. They 
shimmered in the starlight as he walked up to her. Laying himself down as 
lightly as possible, he wrapped his arms around her to pull her into a close 
embrace. That moment of tenderness and comfort was amazing, a new sensation 
that he had long been stripped of and still desired. "Lyryn..."

Inhaling slowly, taking in the comfort of Tel?s nearness, she couldn?t help the 
smile that played at the corner of her lips. She shifted slightly, deeper into 
his arms, running her hand down his chest and around over his arm. Again, that 
feeling of completion washed over her anew. She wondered if it would always be 
this way. "Tel..."

His breath caught in his throat as the emotional aggravation hit him like a 
torpedo. It rocked him to his soul. That was one of the many consequences of 
the pain transference that he had undertaken when last they had met - increased 
connection of emotional issues. He wanted to push it away, bury it under all 
his training and not touch it again. The moment, whatever sanctuary that it had 
been to their clandestine affair, was shattered. Tel traced a line down her 
bare arm and palmed her hand in his own. 



"I was worried about you," she admitted.

"I'm all right." 

Opening her eyes, she stared into his in the darkness, as if she were truly 
seeing him. "No pain?" 

He couldn't lie to her, "It hurt, more so than I imagined, but nothing that I 
wouldn't endure again for you to feel better. I've handled far worse than that. 
What I want to know is why you're hurting right now...inside." He touched a 
spot on her stomach before returning his hand to hers. "Something is wrong."

She offered him a small smile, "I?m not exactly used to being bed-ridden. It 
has its frustrations. I don?t like being weak. Vulnerable." 

"You are many things, Lyryn, but weak is not one of them." He kissed her 
lightly on the neck, nestling his face into the crook of her shoulder, "That's 
not what I was referring to. I think you know what I'm talking about. What did 
he say to you?"

She closed her eyes with his kiss, comforted and exhilarated at the same time 
with his warm breath on her neck. "How do you know so much?" 

He paused, contemplating the ramifications of answering the question as 
truthfully as he could. "You forget who I am." His words shadowed the smile 
that had appeared on his face, "I do have my secrets, Lyryn, but that isn't one 
of them. Let's just say that I have an eye and an ear in everything that 
happens onboard. Got to protect my secrecy here." It wasn't entirely truthful, 
but it wasn't blatantly false either. 

She moved a little closer, if it were possible, needing that reassuring 
contact, but still she didn?t say anything except, "I don?t forget who you are."

"Tell me when you're ready," Tel placed a hand behind his head and laid down on 
the pillow, his hand still entwined in hers. "Does it bother you that you still 
haven't seen my face? Is my presence really all you care about?" It was a new 
feeling, and an assumed welcome change in topic, to still have that simple 
barrier between them. Anonymity was his forte on the job, but how does one mix 
business and pleasure? 

"That?s twice you?ve asked me that question."

"And twice you've avoided answering it."

"I told you before that it wasn?t important, and I meant it."

He breathed in her scent, letting his mind wander and entwining itself with 
hers. "You're conflicted. I sense it now more than ever. Two personalities, two 
minds, two entities fighting for the position that only one can hold. I don't 
know how to help you with this. Only you can handle the situation inside you." 
His words felt hollow, meaningless jargon that was spewed from a seemingly 
uncaring mouth. Where had his sincerity gone? 

"I didn?t ask for your help. I didn't ask for any of this," she told him 
honestly, pulling her hand away from his. 

Tel grabbed her hand back, "Well, you're stuck with it. You have to do 
something, otherwise this is going to slowly consume both your identities. I -- 
you can't allow that to happen. You mean too much to too many people. Your role 
on this ship is vital." He felt as if he was grasping at straws. For the first 
time, he truly had no clue what to say. A helpless feeling, to be sure. 

"Elissabeth wants me to go away. Said this is her life now. And she?s right... 
but I didn?t want to... couldn?t give you up." It hurt her to finally admit the 
truth, but there it was, entirely laid out for him, her barest feelings, 
furthering that vulnerability.

The inner turmoil engulfed him. "Lyryn, Elissabeth, whoever, I have to leave." 

"I understand." That hollow emptiness she felt at just hearing the words 
projected to him; there was no way she could?ve covered it up that quickly. But 
if he wanted to leave, then he would, for whatever noble reason he deemed 
necessary. It was the way of life.

"I'm not just talking about leaving right now. I'm talking about leaving 
Avalon. Dropping off the radar a bit."

"Leaving... me?"

The words stung, to the point where he had to turn away. "I can't be the cause 
of this pain. One personality loves me, the other sees me as nothing but a 
threat to ship-wide security. I won't stand around and be the reason that 
you're ripping yourself apart inside," he turned to her, compassion in his 
eyes, "It's not fair to either of us if I stay."

"I do love you. More than anything and everything." She surprised herself with 
the words.

"Where do you see this going, Lyryn? Honestly." 

"Where did you see it going, Tel, when you showed up in that training room?" 

"I didn't." 

"Love is an ill-conceived plan, isn't it?"  She paused, waiting for him to 
answer.  When he didn't, she conceded.  "Kiss me again and tell me you want to 
leave. I won't stop you." 

He moved over, planting his lips on hers. He let it linger for a moment, 
savoring it himself. He pulled back, their lips parting. He eyed her, Tel's 
eyes penetrating her soul. "Good-bye, Lyryn."

"Tell me you want to leave," she repeated. 

"I want to leave," Tel said simply, staring at her. She would never know the 
reasons why.

"Good-bye."


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