<USS Avalon> "No More Secrets"

"No More Secrets"
 Captain Skyler and  Ensign Sera Teryn  
  
 
 
Tery had left the  Engineering deck and gone back to her Quarters, but she'd 
felt restless there.  They seemed somehow more... empty... than they had 
before. It's because Skyler's not here. She  sighed. She didn't want to seem 
codependent, but she wanted to be around the  other lady... for a long time. 
Then 
just  do it! What're you standing here for!? Decision made, she left her 
quarters  and made her way to Skyler's, tapping the door chime once upon 
reaching 
them...  and hoping... 
Skyler had been a  total wreck since seeing Tery and then talking to Moreya. 
She didn't know what  to do. She had feelings for both of them. Tery wanted 
everything Skyler wanted.  A family. Was it possible? Could they become a 
family? In the middle of her  thoughts she heard a tap at her door. "Enter." 
She sounds distracted. I wonder what's  wrong? Tery keyed the door open on t
he command to enter and let her eyes  take in the sight before her. Prophets,  
she's beautiful! She noticed the 'enter' instead of 'come in' too. Did it  
mean anything? She looks upset. Did I do  something to upset her? "Skyler? Are 
you all right?" She asked softly, true  care and concern showing in her grey 
eyes and her soft voice. 
Looking up she saw  Tery standing there. "Tery. How are you? I'm just a 
little tired. Nothing  major." Standing Skyler walked over and kissed Tery 
gently. 
"I'm glad to see  you. Come in and have a seat. I will get us something to 
drink." She walked over  to the replicator and got them both some ice tea. She 
returned handing a glass  to Tery and sat down on the couch. 
At the kiss, Tery  smiled ever so softly, then returned it before Skyler 
moved away. "I'm glad I  came." She returned softly as Skyler moved off. 
Tease... 
but I like it! She took the  offered tea and considered which piece of 
furniture to sit on. After a moment,  she curled up on one end of the couch, 
eyes 
surveying Skyler carefully. "You  sure you're okay?" 
Skyler was looking  at Tery wondering what was on her mind. "Yeah I'm okay. 
Just a little tired I  guess. Trying to figure a few things out. What have you 
been up to? Did you meet  with Lt. K'etrall?" Way to go Skyler just  ramble 
on. That will get her attention... 
Tery could sense  there was more, but she left it alone. Skyler would talk to 
her when she needed  to or wanted to. She shrugged. "Yes." She answered, 
taking a sip of the tea.  "She's... interesting. I didn't even know Klingons 
and 
Betazoids were  compatible." She frowned slightly. That hadn't quite come out 
the way she'd  meant it. "She gave me Alpha Shift." She added with a smile. 
Hopefully that'll please her as much as it  does me. "So I'm off the clock. And 
I 
thought... well..." She faltered. Come on, Tery! Get it together! "I  thought 
I'd come by and we could talk a bit more... unless you have something  else 
you need to be doing." Oh, good  one! 
"I don't have  anything else to do. K'etrall is an interesting person, 
granted I haven't spent  a great deal of time with her. I'm glad to hear she 
gave 
you Alpha shift. It's a  good shift." What is your problem Skyler?  Can't you 
even act excited to see her when you know you are? "I'm glad you  came. I 
really 
am even though I'm not acting like it. We probably should  talk.....you know 
figure out what we are doing or what we really want." Idiot you know what you  
want... 
Something was off;  Tery didn't have to be a telepath or empath to sense it. 
After all they'd said  this morning, now Skyler was... mundane?... about 
seeing her. There was  something definitely that needed discussing, but what 
worried her was what that  something would be. "I agree." She answered, 
suddenly 
worried about all of this  collapsing out from under her. "I know you're glad 
to 
see me, but I can see  something's wrong too." She began, resting her tea 
glass on her curled-up knee.  "Maybe if we started with that, it would help?" 
She 
offered. She hadn't meant to  press that, but it seemed to be hampering 
Skyler's emotional state, so it was  important to deal with it, whatever it 
was. 
Sighing Skyler put  her glass down and reached out and took Tery's hands in 
hers. Her skin felt soft  and light against her own. "Tery....I know how I feel 
about you and have a  pretty good idea about how you feel. The problem is I 
don't know what to do? I  don't want to put your career at risk. There is also 
someone else who means a  great deal to me, and I also know that nothing will 
ever happen with that  person. You don't have to worry about that. That is the 
truth." Reaching up  Skyler put her hand softly on Tery's cheek, playing with 
her ear ring. "You are  a beautiful woman. A woman anyone would be happy to 
be with." 
As Skyler's hand  rested against her cheek, Tery leaned gently into the 
gesture, feeling the light  toying with her earring and smiling slightly at the 
gesture of gentle  familiarity. "As are you, Skyler." She returned very softly, 
her own hand coming  up to brush gently over Skyler's cheek in return of her 
gesture. "And I want to  be with you... more than anything." She assured. She 
knew she should feel  jealous of this other who held Skyler's heart as well, 
but 
she couldn't for some  reason. Because another holds a place in  your heart, 
and he always will. "I'm not worried about it. If you say I  shouldn't, then I 
won't." She reached up and took hold of Skyler's hand, turning  her face so 
that she could kiss her palm softly. "As to my career being at risk,  isn't 
that my choice to make?" She asked gently. It was not a challenge, merely  a 
statement wrapped in question's clothing. 
"I don't want to  ruin things for you. I guess I'm scared. Relationships and 
I don't always work  out the way I want them to and I am afraid of ruining 
this one. I don't know  what to do. I don't know what to do Tery. A friend 
asked 
me if my partner,  meaning you, wanted this as much as I did in my heart. Do 
you? Do you want to  risk everything just to be with me? To have a family which 
includes a ten yr.  old girl who has never really had a family. I'm not 
trying to push you away, I  am just trying to figure things out. Not doing so 
good 
am I?" No, you're not Skyler. You're going to end  up pushing her out the 
door... 
OK, that hadn't been  the answer Tery had expected, but neither was she that 
easy to scare off. She'd  lived through the Occupation of Bajor, after all. 
And then, there had  been... 
She sighed softly.  "Skyler, I don't know the right answers anymore than you 
do. But I do know this.  I want to be with you. I know I should be worried 
about what Starfleet will  think when they find out, but... I can't. Family, 
love, it's too important to  me. Too basic." 
She took that hand  down and clasped it between both of hers. "We both know 
that we want this. We  both know that it's love. Right?" 
Looking down at  their clasped hands Skyler knew it felt right. It felt like 
they had always been  together. "Yes....I want it as much as you do Tery. Do I 
have the right to ask  you to risk everything because of what I want? It 
feels like love. I want it to  be love, but like I said I've never really known 
a 
love like this. I don't know  how I should feel. Every time I think it's the 
right thing it turns out to be  wrong." A lone tear started to well in her eye 
and fell onto Tery's  hand. 
Tery reached up her  other hand and gently stroked Skyler's cheek. "I 
understand." She said softly,  bringing their intertwined hands up to place a 
soft 
kiss to Skyler's fingers.  Her eyes never left Skyler's though. "And it's okay. 
Books make it all look so  easy, but it isn't always." She took that hand that 
had gently stroked Skyler's  cheek and gently lifted her chin with it to meet 
her gaze once more. "But that's  not the important bit. If the two want it 
badly enough, they find a way to make  it work. And we will." She reached out 
and embraced Skyler, holding her close,  the tea now forgotten on the coffee 
table. "We will. I believe that. I believe  in us." She told her softly, 
stroking 
Skyler's hair gently. 
For the second time  that day she found herself wrapped in the arms of 
someone she cared about and  who cared about her. She didn't understand why she 
was 
so hesitant. Feeling  Tery's arms wrapped around her Skyler snuggled in 
closer, smelling her perfume.  She felt like she was where she belonged. "Do 
you 
really think we can make it  work? Have a family?" That is what I want  more 
than 
anything... 
Tery smiled down at  Skyler, wrapped in her arms. "I know we can, Skyler." 
She murmured softly,  placing a soft kiss into her hair. "I know we can." 
Because we both want it so badly... the same  thing. Family... 
"I told Tavi about  you. About what happened. I told her there would be no 
secrets between us and  she could tell something was up. I hope you don't 
mind?" 
Skyler broke the  embrace and looked into Tery's eyes. "I don't want there to 
be any secrets  between us. Whoever comes into my life is also coming into 
Tavi's life. They  have to accept her as well as me." I hope  you can Tery, God 
I hope you can... 
Tery smiled warmly.  Skyler had told her about the child before, so it was no 
surprise that she  mentioned the girl now. "It's all right." She assured. But 
no secrets? What would you think of me  if you knew mine? Would you still 
want me? "It sounds like a good policy."  She added with a smile, though she 
was 
a bit concerned now. 
"If we are going to  make this work we can't have any secrets between us 
either. I've seen too many  relationships fall apart because of hidden truths. 
I 
won't keep anything from  you and I don't want you to keep anything from me. I 
will always do my best to  be honest with you. I will even admit to the time I 
almost killed myself." Like she's gonna want to hear about that.  Real 
romantic Skyler....not. 
Tery tightened her  grip slightly, comfortingly. "I'm sorry that you felt 
that was necessary." She  commiserated. "But I won't press. You tell me only 
what 
you want to talk about."  She smoothed Skyler's hair gently and sighed. "But 
as long as we're keeping no  secrets... I... I have one." She hesitated. "I'm 
not what I seem." 
"What do you mean  you're not what you seem? Are you a Borg mutation or 
something strange like  that? Please don't tell me you are a changeling? As far 
as 
I can see you are a  very, attractive and desirable woman. And if you want to 
hear I will tell you  why I almost killed myself. I am not one to be 
judgmental, believe  me." 
Tery winced but  nodded. "I want to hear anything you're willing to tell, 
Skyler." She answered.  But how do I tell you this? "And what  I mean is this. 
I'm not a Founder, since you brought up changelings. But I am a  changeable 
life 
form. A true GenoMorph. And before you say anything, my kind  aren't like the 
Founders. They don't want to control anything. They're just...  Oh, 
prophets!" She faltered and finally just fell silent. What else could she  say? 
It was 
all probably over now anyway, now that she'd told her secret. Please... please 
 understand... 
Skyler was stunned.  She had not expected anything like this. But it 
shouldn't matter should it?  "What is a GenoMorph and what do you mean by 
changeable 
life form? Don't be  afraid to tell me. Please." 
And there it goes, the last shred of  hope. "A GenoMorph is a life form which 
can truly become a thing. If it  becomes a table, it is a table. And so on." 
She was tense now, fearful.  "Changeable life form... just what it says... 
that I can change my form. But...  we... " She sighed and bowed her head. "I 
know 
how everyone feels about the  Dominion, and I understand it. But we aren't 
them. We're peaceful. We were  almost destroyed by an outside species. We would 
never inflict that on another."  She swallowed and looked up, daring to see 
what lay in the other woman's eyes  even though she feared it. "I don't want to 
lose you, Skyler. And now there are  no secrets. Please, try to understand. I 
didn't take this form to..." She  swallowed, and her eyes misted over as she 
remembered why she had taken this form. "I'm sorry." She  whispered, head 
bowing once more. 
Taking her hand and  lifting it to Tery's chin, it was her turn to look her 
in the eye. "You haven't  lost me Tery. It may take a little getting used to 
but you are who you are and  that is not anything to be sorry for. I'm not 
going 
to complain about the form  you have taken. I think it is rather appealing." 
She gently wiped the tears away  with her hand and leaned in to kiss her 
gently. 
Tery held her close,  tightly. "I'm not sorry for what I am, Skyler. I'm 
sorry that I can't explain it  better and that it... upsets you." She answered 
softly, still somewhat tearily.  She returned the soft kiss. "But thank you for 
that. There really was a Sera  Teryn once. This isn't just a random form. But 
it's... she was... strong and  good and... I thought too good to die the way 
she did. So I... I took this form  to continue what she started. Because I 
loved 
her." She reached forward and  stroked Skyler's cheek again gently. "And I 
love you now. And I think you're a  lovely woman and good and strong and g
entle." 
Reaching up Skyler  placed her hand on Tery's. "I'm not upset....just 
surprised. It doesn't change  anything. I'm sure for whatever reason you took 
on this 
form it was a good one.  You are still a very attractive, loving and kind 
person. If I didn't feel that  from you, you wouldn't be sitting here now. You 
have nothing to fear from  me...please believe that. Now as for how I came 
about 
almost killing myself. I  told you I wasn't good with relationships and it 
was because of the pain I felt  I had caused that I went into a Betazoid 
self-induced coma. I just let myself  slip away. If it hadn't been for a good 
friend 
I wouldn't be here today. She  somehow managed to tap into my unconscious and 
talk me back from the brink.  Unfortunately when I did awaken I decided that I 
didn't want to cause anyone  else pain so I had what ever pain I could 
inflicted on me just so I could feel  like I was alive. Feeling something 
anything. 
I think I spent more time in  sickbay then I had in a long time. I just kept 
going back to the holodeck with  the safeties off, running programs I was bound 
to get hurt in. But at least I  wasn't hurting anyone else. When it was all 
said and done it was Moreya who made  me realize there were other ways to feel 
things. Better ways. I'm still learning  but if you bear with me I will do my 
best not to hurt you. I would rather hurt  myself than hurt someone else. I 
know that makes no sense, but that's the way it  is. If you want to run now I 
will understand." 
This was the first  time since everything had happened that Skyler had told 
anyone about what she  had tried to do to herself. "You are the first person I 
have told any of this  to. If I didn't believe that there was going to be an 
us, I wouldn't have told  you.  I will still understand if you feel that I am 
more than you bargain  for. What with an already made family and all. God I 
hope she doesn't run  away? I really would like a chance at a life with her. I 
hope she feels the  same. 
Run?  Why the devil should I want to run?  Tery held Skyler close and shook 
her  head.  "Not at all, Skyler.  I want this; if I didn't, we wouldn't be  
having this conversation at all.  I'd not have given you my secret either."  
She 
stroked the other woman's hair.  "With so much hatred of Changers, it's a  
dangerous secret to have, much less to give out."  She sighed and rested her 
cheek against  Skyler's.  "And family... I want  that... miss it..."  She said  
softly. 
She's not  running away....She is still here and wants to stay here. Am I 
dreaming all  of this?  Feeling the other woman's cheek against her own made 
her  
skin tingle. Skyler felt like this relationship and everything that came with 
it  was worth it. "Speaking of families.....I want you to know that I want 
you to be  a part of mine and Tavi's. You should also know that Moreya has 
agreed to be  Tavi's godmother. It doesn't mean any less of you, but since I 
thought perhaps  you would be joining our family that you would make a better 
mother 
or whatever  Tavi decides to call you. If anything were to happen to either 
of us, she would  have Moreya to look after her. I hope you understand..." 
Looking gently into  Tery's eyes she could see how she felt. She ran a finger 
softly across her soft  lips, while brushing her hair away from her face. 
"You are very beautiful my  Tery. Very beautiful."  She gently kissed Tery 
slowly 
and softly. Relishing  in her taste and the softness of her lips. 
Tery understood, even before Skyler explained her  reasons.  And she again 
had that feeling that she should be jealous.   But she couldn't.  It made 
perfect sense.  Then all else was washed  away in the kiss, and Tery felt her 
eyes 
closing as she returned the gentle  tenderness.  After a moment, she pulled 
back, but only far enough to meet  Skyler's eyes once more.  "I do understand, 
Skyler.  And I think it's  an excellent idea."  She said softly.  "If you trust 
Moreya, then I  trust her."  She let her fingers trace Skyler's cheek softly.  
"I am  so glad we met, my Beautiful Lady..."  She murmured before kissing 
Skyler  again softly and tenderly. 
Melting into Tery's kiss, Skyler didn't want it to end.  She didn't want to 
be alone. Not tonight. Not when this woman was here...now.  Tavi's in bed, the 
bridge is covered. Looking into Tery's eyes she  whispered softly, "Stay. Stay 
here tonight. With me. I want to wake up with you  at my side. 
Leaning in Skyler kissed Tery again. Gently at first,  inhaling her scent and 
letting the taste of her lips linger on her tongue as she  traced her lips. 
She pulled her closer and kissed her with more passion and  desire. She didn't 
want the woman to go. 
TBC

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