<USS Avalon> If Only For A Moment by Junior Lieutenant Anthony Manson
- From: Anthony Manson <circus_ofde_damned@xxxxxxxxx>
- To: Avalon Sim <avalon@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Sun, 25 Jan 2004 00:43:04 -0800 (PST)
If Only For A Moment...
By Junior Lieutenant Anthony Manson
Upon every dream, there is the possibility of hope. Upon every dream, there is
fear. Dreams of love. Dreams of life. Dreams of anticipation and the glory of
being the one to make difference. The one to be remembered. To be cherished. To
be recognized. Or maybe to have that one single greatest opportune moment where
everything is finally as it should be. That one smile that is etched with the
effort to achieve it as they look into the eyes of others standing in midst a
crowd; or standing in front of that person which they shared their souls with.
But there is the dark fronts of every dream. The long forgotten memory that
refuses to be tied down and ignored. It is the dark that shows the light the
reality and the harsh truth of the world and the universe. It is the dark that
induces fear, and in turn makes the light fight harder then ever before to
achieve their goal they work so hard to establish. Fear in itself is a reminder
that peace is commodity- not a gift of permanence and promise.
And just like dreams, minds hold the same reality. They hold hope for their
future, they smile and contemplate the way their lives go at present. They grin
at the sight of a loved one, and they laugh at the humor of another- or of
themselves. Just as opposite, they shout in anger. Cry in agony. Retreat to the
corner to run from obstacles that is otherwise unbeatable. They despair in the
moment and realize that for one moment they are not where they should be, and
the path to get back would be harder then anything they have every faced.
They place themselves into the imagination of which only the mind can conjure
up. They place themselves with such joy that one would think nirvana- as it
were- was achieved; and indeed their own personal Golden Age. They take the
positive, and in the moment- that very moment- they come to an understanding
that this is a life that was truly meant to be. The life worth living, the life
worth mentioning, the life that only the future generations could hear of.
There is that crystal clear perfect comprehension that bridges the mortal mind
to the gift of near omniscience; and it feels wonderful. Like a flame that once
was small is now flared to brightened up the most darkest of rooms. The beacon
of life that gives a clear message that it will not go out; that it shall rise
from the abyss itself and shine the way it was once gazed upon.
Yet they hold the fear of end. The fear of loss. The fear of death. The fear of
being alone. No one should be alone. Nothing is as sad then a person that is
alone; it is the worst thing a person could go through in life. The black voids
of which the mind will not accept and let it spill into the their beings. After
all, to let such a black stain exist and be recognized can only mean that their
souls were to be tainted. But aren?t all souls tainted anyway? It is the way of
things. But it takes that certain wisdom to know the acceptable amount of this
dark side that should be the influence of one?s action. And it scares the mind.
It is the attractive part of power, lust, and greed. It is the intoxicating
drug that tells the mind that while the light may be a great source to attain,
the gifts of the darkness are the sacrifice of your being. Who and what the
mind has become in return for your greatest desires.
And with that brings conflict. Conflicts of interests that builds up to
compromise. Conflicts that makes the mind wonder which side it is truly on. To
know how to settle this, to come to an understanding that for every cause,
there is a reaction. Like thrown pebbles to the still water, it will be
disturbing- of that can be most guaranteed. And like a phoenix, morals are
placed in front of these conflicts to deaden solutions and desperate measure.
Rising like the ashes, the soul takes a new purpose. It sets rules that cannot
be broken. Barriers that cannot be touched by either side, yet at the very same
time work with the two sides in almost relative harmony. It becomes nothing
less than the culmination of life itself. It can be almost said that the famous
question, "to be or not to be?" is the exactement of this.
And when that one person looks upon the universe while reflecting on their own
life; they suddenly understand in that moment who and what they are. If only
for a moment. But that moment in itself is enough for them go through life.
Searching for their goals, their happiness, and when it is all over and the
battles are all won; they will find peace.
Anthony breathed out and inhaled again as his eyes were closed, body relaxed
with his legs folded in and hands to his knees. He heard them, felt them again
for the uncountless times he had done this. And he went on, another section of
the wall- the fortress of his own mind- to be completed before the night was
gone as it wanes thin by every minute. He sat there, and for him life had made
sense for once...
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