atw: Re: 'Within' or just 'in'? [SEC=UNCLASSIFIED]

Hi Howard,

I can't help you out with an authority, but I am glad you're looking for
one.

There is a rule of thumb that says "If you can take something out and
the sentence is better, or at least no worse, then take it out". If I
were you, I would simply test the prose by changing 'within' to 'in' and
see if it works.
That should be enough to justify your editorial decision.

_Personally_, I would reserve use of 'within' to where I need to express
the idea of limitation: ('within two weeks',for example).
In my experience, overuse of 'within' is another way in which some
writers attempt to 'dignify' their writing.   

-----Original Message-----
From: austechwriter-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:austechwriter-bounce@xxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Silcock, Howard
DR
Sent: Monday, 1 May 2006 11:20 AM
To: austechwriter@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: atw: 'Within' or just 'in'? [SEC=UNCLASSIFIED]

Recently I've found myself repeatedly changing 'within' to 'in' in
documents I've been editing. For example, when I see 'abbreviations used
within this document', my red pen goes through the 'with' part of
'within', almost by itself. 

However, where possible I like to have some quotable authority to back
me up when I make these changes. So I've been hunting - and I can't find
any usage guide that even mentions the distinction between 'within' and
'in'. I'm sure there are places where 'within' is a better word to use -
for example, where you want extra emphasis - but can anyone point me to
a document that explains the difference in meaning? (I'm talking about
the prepositional use, not adverbial, by the way.) 

Some of you may remember the Editor's Blacklist
(http://members.iinet.net.au/~howard.silcock/checklist.html) that I
developed, based on work with other technical writers who worked here at
Defence, and shamelessly plugged on this list some time ago. Well, we
included 'within' on the Blacklist, but as far as I remember it was one
of the others who proposed it and we didn't ever look for any
justification. I think removing four unnecessary letters is a pretty
good justification on its own, but I'm still surprised that I can't find
any support from Fowler or one of those other sources.

Can anyone help?

Howard

----------------------------------
     Howard L. Silcock
      Technical Writer
 Common Services SOE Program
Network Infrastructure Development
    Department of Defence
      109 Kent Street
      Deakin ACT 2600           
      (02) 626 58395  
----------------------------------





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