atw: FW: News Flash: School Teacher Arrested in New York

Hi everyone,

I thought this was good enough for the list so enjoy.

Cheers,

Bruce Ashley

  NEW YORK

  A public school teacher was arrested today at John F.
  Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board
  a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, 
  a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a
  morning press conference, Attorney General John
  Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the
  notorious Al-gebra movement.

  He did not identify the man, who has been charged by 
  the FBI with carrying weapons of maths instruction.
  "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Ashcroft said. "They
  desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes
  go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They 
  use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to
  themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they
  belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval
  with coordinates in every country. As the Greek 
  philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides
  to every triangle'.

  When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush
  said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of
  maths instruction, He would have given us more fingers 
  and toes.

  White House aides told reporters they could not recall
  a more intelligent or profound statement by the
  president.

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